Ferrero Rocher Golden Gifting Moment

Hello everyone. I wanted to take some time and talk about one of my favorite holiday treats and that is Ferrero Rocher. As an Influenster, I received a box of Ferrero Rocher and I wish I could capture the look on my face when I opened the box and saw them. If you are one of few who have not had a chance to experience them or have never heard of Ferrero Rocher, here is a brief description...

Ferrero Rocher® is a unique and delicious chocolate experience made by Italian chocolatier Ferrero, since 1982. The chocolates are a tempting combination of smooth chocolaty cream surrounding a whole hazelnut; within a delicate, crisp wafer. . . all enveloped in milk chocolate and finely chopped hazelnuts. The chocolates are individually wrapped in gold foil. Ferrero offers beautiful, premium gift boxes that make any moment truly golden! Ferrero Rocher® chocolates can be purchased at most grocery, drug and mass merchandiser stores.

One golden moment that I can remember is when I was a teenager looking in my stocking for my "stuffers" and finding five golden Ferrero Rochers. The excitement as I took a bite into what was the most delicious and decadent chocolate is a memory that I still hold to this day and that I plan on sharing with my family in their stockings for Christmas. 
These tasty treats are the perfect gift for anyone, though I should caution that if they have nut or dairy allergies, exercise great caution. They are also the perfect treat for any special gathering and it doesn't have to be a holiday to enjoy their goodness. Truth be told I enjoy them year round. 

To learn more about Ferrero Rocher USA feel free to check out their website: http://www.ferrerorocherusa.com/

This package of Ferrero Rocher was received complimentarily (for free) from Influenster for testing and review purposes.
    

That's The Stuff I Don't Like

Nothing Says I Don't Like It Like Steven Colbert With His Head On His Desk

Hey everybody. I decided to do another tag blog for you. If you are a YouTube addict like me then you have seen these video tags over the 'net for a few weeks or so. Since I don't have a decent enough camera or editing equipment to do the video, I decided that I would blog about it instead. So the gist is to just talk about things you don't like or may get on your nerves, so let's do it to it.

1. People who eat or drink something and leave a corner or a drop in the fridge like they are doing you a favor. I hate this. In fact I have family members (no names) who have or still do this. There have been times when I have had my mouth set ready to eat or drink something, only to find the empty or near empty container still in the fridge. Dammit if you are going to eat or drink that much you might as well finish it off. I'll be less pissed if you do.

2. Facebook/Twitter tough guys. What this mean is if you are bad enough to say something on Facebook/Twitter then you should be able to back it up in person. Not sub tweeting or using vague status messages to say what is on your mind. Dammit put it out there if it is serious enough to warrant venting on social media. And while we are at it...

3. People who put all their business on social media and then get mad when someone calls them out for it. I have a social media friend (we know each other in real life as well) who is always posting what she's doing, where she's going, what she's wearing/eating/drinking. However when someone brings up where the money for all this is coming from or here her child is, she's ready to start fighting. The way I see it, don't put all your business in the streets and then you won't have "haters" questioning you. Just sayin'.

4. People who get in my personal space. You want a one way ticket to a butt kicking? Just get in my personal space and don't get out of it. Seriously. Try it.

5. People who are just plain disrespectful to the President of the United States. I mean seriously. Donald Trump, Mitt Romney, hell the entire GOP/Tea Party. Calm your nerves. Because your attitudes are trickling down to some of my Republican friends and they are getting out of pocket and some of their personal issues are issues that could be solved if they would only open their eyes and stop listening to Fox News for five minutes.

6. My check engine light in my car. It know what it is doing and it's getting on my nerves.

7. People who stare at me when Itty is throwing a tantrum. Okay I get it. Her crying is irritating and makes you want to run out the room, store, ect. screaming. However, what to do you want from me. I can either ignore it until I get her somewhere where I can dish out discipline or dish it out in front of you and have you get the law involved and then I have to jump on you. Surely you must have children who drive you nuts as well.

Okay last one because I'm starting to run out of things:

8. People who reach onto my plate. Okay we're eating and you see something on my plate that you like. Please don't just help yourself. Ask me and I will fix you a sample for you to try. Reach on my plate without clearance and you might draw back a nub. Or a fork mark on your hand. Just sayin'.

Well peeps there are the things I don't like. I hope this was fun for you as it was for me. Who knows I may end up recording this as well as a video response or something. We'll see. Until next time loves.

Afton

Just When I Was About To Count Something Out...

Hey everybody out there in the blogosphere! It's me once again writing to you to let you know what has been going on as of late. The most important thing right now is that I GOT A JOB!!!!! Finally and it is not selling perfume and cologne in a parking lot praying that I get enough money to at least pay the coworker who is using their car and their gas. I am back in with the state as a correctional officer. It's funny how things come full circle sometimes. I once said that I would never ever work in corrections again only to realize that it is truly what I was meant to do. It is something that I see myself doing until either I'm too old or dead to do the job any more. That's how much I enjoyed my work when I was a CO four years ago. 

Secondly, now that my job hunt is over, my house hunting can begin. I have resolved that I am done with apartments. I grew up in them and I realized that now that I am a married career woman with two kids, I'm ready for a house. I have been looking at renting a house for now with an option to buy. I kind of want to work out my financials and pay off some of my student loans before I look at becoming a home owner. Also since my job is not in Raleigh, we are considering moving closer to my job but within a reasonable distance for Lovey to continue to go to his job. As soon as I find my new home and get settled, I will definitely be blogging about it.

Thirdly, I created a hair and beauty blog, so that I can reach out to more blog lovers like myself. It is titled "Same Hair Different Head" even though I might end up changing it later. So if you want to know more about my crazy hair journey then be sure to mosey on over to Same Hair Different Head and check it out. I am also working on my YT channel which is 'hotrdumommy'. It's still a little bare bones right now but I am working on it as soon as I can find the time and a better camera.

Finally, I want to say something about the upcoming election. I'm just burned out from everything but maybe it is because I already know who I am voting for and I'm just waiting for everything to be over so everything can get back to some sort of normal. I don't know. I'm starting to think my passion for everything political is starting to wane a little bit.

Well that's all for now. Thanks to everyone who takes the time to check my blog out and tell a friend about me. If you want me to check your blog out, leave a link in the comments section and I will be sure to get back to you on it. Until next time!!

Afton

What's With These Superstar Dads Getting Full Custody of Their Kids

Source

Hello everyone out there in the world (I swear I will come up with a better opening. I promise.) Anyway the reason I am writing this morning (since it is after midnight here in NC) is that I've noticed a small trend lately. If you know me then you know that I am all about gossip blogs. You know like TMZ, Media Takeout, E! Online, ect... Also if you follow those blogs you will have read or heard that Usher recently got full custody of his two young sons that he had with his ex-wife Tameka Foster. When I first saw that they were in court for it, in my mind I said "Oh Usher will probably get more visitation with his kids, but I don't see him getting full physical custody." I didn't understand what Tameka had done to make her unfit to care for her young sons. Also she has children from other relationships and their fathers aren't coming after her to take those kids away either. Well if you followed the trial, then you heard that Tameka put the smack down on Usher for bringing his new girlfriend with him to pick up his sons. Okay first of all I believe there is more to that story because being a woman, the last think you want to see is your man trying to play father of the year and family man with some new chick and YOUR kids!! So if I was in her shoes and PJ was in Usher's, then yeah, PJ may have felt a size 11 going up side his head sorry. Anyhoo there was also speculation that Usher had cheated on Tameka with one of her bridesmaids. Again if that had of been me, the trial I would be involved in would not be a custody trial, it would possibly be either an assault trial or worse. Well from the outside looking in, it seemed like more of a nasty divorce case than a custody hearing. In all I read I failed to see where Tameka would have been considered an unfit parent and that custody of her children should be stripped from her. Well maybe the judge saw something because Tameka doesn't have custody of her sons right now. Oh but not to worry, she has appealed the ruling on the grounds that the judge may be biased because Usher's attorney's contributed to that's judge's election campaigns. Of course the judge dismissed the motion to appeal and now basically Usher is stating through his attorney's that he has won and she needs to get over it. I'm sorry but in what bizarro world would a mother every stop fighting for her kids? Especially one who has not to long ago had to bury one of her kids after a tragic accident. I would fight until there were no other options, but I would not just roll over and accept what has happened and I don't believe that any reasonable person should expect Tameka to do so either. Which leads me to my question: What is with these superstar dads getting full custody without any real evidence that the mother is unfit?

I have been asking this question since Dewayne Wade got custody of his kids after a nasty and bitter divorce from his wife. His marital problems were also tabloid fodder because for a time there was the rumor that he was getting his freak on with girlfriend Gabrielle Union in front of the kids. Also Gabby lost a bit of respect from some people because D-Wade was technically still married when they got together. However, I haven't seen where he ex-wife is unfit to be a parent to their kids full time. From what I gathered she is a bit pissed off about the whole situation and if I was in her shoes, I wouldn't be skipping down the street, but that's just me. Maybe there is something that says that it would not be in the kids best interests to be with her full time, but to me it just seems that because these men are respected in their communities and make a ton of money, they have to be the best option for their kids and their relatively unknown spouses are just left with their cheese in the wind so to speak. Both D-Wade and Usher have said that their reasons for seeking full custody is because they were not getting enough visitation and time with their children and they made vows to be good fathers to their children no matter what. Don't get me wrong, I find that to be outstanding and noble due to the fact that they are trying to break a cycle of no constant male presence growing up. However, what does that do to them to be taken from their mothers who have been their since birth because you can't come to some sort of agreement. Now before people start throwing bricks through my window, the door swings both ways. The mothers can also open the door of communication and make sure that things are comfortable for all parties, but I just feel a little raw about mother's being denied the chance to raise their kids when it is the fathers who left (evidenced by the fact that they are the ones who filed for divorce).

Back to Usher real quick. Sunday night he was interviewed by Oprah and in that interview he admitted to cheating on his wife (even though he tried to say that they were separated (yeah right). Now to me when a husband cheats and there are kids involved, he not only cheats on his wife, but he cheats on his kids as well by showing them the wrong way to end a marriage that they feel is no longer working. That's just my opinion. To sum things up because I am about to fall asleep at the keyboard, I just think that these superstars are getting away with what ever because the legal system is too star struck to look at the evidence and truly do what is right for the kids. I would say to the men out there who want full custody of their kids to ask themselves are they truly doing this for the sake of their kids or are they doing this to get back at the mother for a past wrong? Is there some way to raise the kids and coexist? Well that's all I have to say about that. Until next time everybody....

A 1000 Ways To Die (But Millions of Ways To Live)

Hey everybody out there that bothers to read my blog when I post something new. I wanted to write this entry and dedicate it to my daughters Itty and Teeny (well not so Teeny because if you see her you'll want to know why I call her Teeny). This morning I woke up and after washing my face and doing my other morning business, I noticed a huge spider on the counter. I didn't know how long it had been there, but after calming my heart rate down, I did what any other arachnophobic does in a situation like that. I killed it and flushed it's body down the toilet. I then wondered what that disgusting creature was thinking before it met its end at the bottom of my pink Old Navy flip-flop. Was it thinking "ah another beautiful day" or "I wonder if that short chick is going to scream when she sees me"? Who knows and who cares. I'm sorry I hate spiders. Anyway I also started to think about myself. As far as I can remember I have always been a little terrified of three things: spiders, bees, and death. With spiders and bees, those fears can be dealt with. I just kill the buggers or run fast as I can to keep from being in the same room as them. However, death is one of those things that try as you might you're going to have to deal with one of these days. I know you are wondering "Why the hell are you dedicating a blog about death to your daughters? Oh no are you thinking about the end all beat all again? Do we need to call the doctor for you?" Don't panic. My depression has been under control for two years now, but I'm writing this for them because as of now, they have no concept of death and its permanence. I remember when my father and grandfather died. Itty was one year old and Camille wasn't even born yet. At that time, I told Itty that her granddad and PaPa had passed away and her response was to give me her juice cup and smile. I wish I could go back to that mentality that death was a foreign notion and that it didn't apply to me. However, you get to the age when someone dies or you see a death played out on television which leads to you saying "But I don't want to die" and someone saying "Well everybody dies" just as easily as someone saying "Everybody poops". You live the next years of your life knowing that anytime, your number can be up. After having Teeny and turning 30, the thought would keep me up nights. I would be scared that I would drop dead at home and the girls would be alone until Lovey came home and found my body. My biggest fear was leaving them alone without me. I would cry myself to sleep and sometimes wonder when and how it was going to happen. However, there was a problem with that. I didn't know and I wouldn't know and nothing in the world can stop it from happening. In fact I took a online questionnaire and based on my answers, with my lifestyle right now I can live to be 75. When I found that out something clicked in me and for the first night since April, I slept soundly. No tears and no thoughts in my head. The next morning when I woke up, I realized something. I could sit and continue to ponder my death and all that entailed until I became an invalid or I could just get off my butt and do the things I want to do and live each and everyday like it was my last. Because as I've said, death is one of those things that has to happen and since nobody has created an immortality potion as of yet, we just have to go with the eventual flow.

So what's waiting for us on the other side? Darkness? Heaven? Hell? Who knows and really do we care? Right now we should be worrying about if the world ended tomorrow could we say that our time on this earth was worth every minute? Did we do all that we set out to do and did we leave here better than we found it? That's what I want my girls to get from this blog someday when they are old enough to read it. Don't sit and ruminate on things that you can do nothing about and go out and do the things that you do have power over. As for me, right now I'm going to sit and do some research on how to drop the 100 pounds that I need to get rid of because when it's my time to go, I'm going to look damn fine.

Until next time my loves

P.S. I also created a "Keep Calm" poster that really puts things at ease for me. You never know when a Gin and Tonic might come in handy. Just sayin'.

Private Organizations and Companies Have The Right To Believe What They Want and I Have The Right To Disassociate From Them

I Love The Way This Oreo Looks!!

Hey everybody in Bloggoland. I haven't blogged in a long time and for that I am sorry, but rest assured that I have been thinking of just what to blog about and trust me this blog is going to be nice.

Unless you have lived under a rock for so many years you may have heard that the Boy Scouts of America has a long standing ban on homosexuals as scouts and scout leaders. If you follow the news then you have heard of scouts who have been scouting since they were little kids to the point of reaching the high ranks only to have it swept out from under them because they are homosexual. Also recently a Boy Scout den mother was banned because she's a lesbian. There has been outrage and even a lawsuit or two; one even reaching the Supreme Court where it was decided that because BSofA is a private organization they can admit or deny membership to whoever they want. Recently, BSofA had the powers that be announce that after "careful" consideration, they decided that their ban on homosexuals will not change. As for what I think of it all? I think that homosexuals should be allowed to participate in scouting. I feel that the board that decided that they would continue to feed into discrimination is only making it so people will associate scouting with discrimination and that's the sad commentary about it. I remember when my brother was a boy scout and from what I can remember, they taught pride and acceptance of all, but little did we know that there was fine print involved. As my title says, BSofA can ban homosexuals all they want because they are a private organization. However, if I have a son, I doubt that I will allow him to be a boy scout as long as this policy is in place. Where is the harm in homosexuals being involved in Boy Scouts. Do the powers that be have an antiquated notion that homosexuality can be harmful to children. It has been proven time and time again that children of same sex couples do no worse or better than children with heterosexual parents raising them. Also with pedophiles the majority of them are heterosexual, so before anyone even thinks about that just stop it. Seriously. Also if a boy scout came to my door selling popcorn, I would have to decline because I can't give money to an organization that talks of belonging and treating others with respect only to say "If you're gay, stay away". I just can't get down with that. Which brings me to my next topic: Chick-fil-A.

A few years ago, my aunt told me in conversation that we should boycott Chick-fil-A because of their stance on homosexuality and same sex marriage. At the time I took it with a grain of salt because a) I love their food and b) their lemonade and peach milkshake rocks my world. I knew that Chick-fil-A was a bit on the "heavily religious" side because they don't open on Sundays (ANYWHERE!!!) and even their kids books have a touch of Christianity to them (not an issue: I'm Baptists and so are my kids). But when I read what their President had to say about same sex marriage and families, I knew enough was enough. It's not enough that they don't support same sex marriage, but for him to say the only family they recognized was the "biblical" definition of family, it kind of pissed me off. My parents divorced when I was 8 or 9 years old and my mother raised me and my brother. We were and are a family. We had an extended family that did and continues to keep us together. We were raised to believe in Christ and the Bible, but to treat ALL people with respect. Does that make us less of anything Mr. Chick-fil-A president? I guess as long as we're spending our money gay or straight but not raised in the "family" way then it doesn't matter as long as your are spending, but once you leave then we will continue to think less of you, yeah not having it. So I resolved that the only way I would spend money in Chick-fil-A again is a)I have to be starving to the point that if I do not eat food, I could possibly die b) I would have to be tied down and force fed the food (which I would fight until I passed out from hunger or c) They change their position and stop funding these right wing nut jobs.

Well I got that off my chest. I know some of you will be like "if you boycott those two, what about the others". Hey as they come across my desk and my research I may have to boycott them as well. As of now Target is on my radar but they are recognizing that their past contributions are not good and are trying to make things right, but if I have to let them go to, I'm willing to do that. Well there you have it. I'll try to blog more often but with two little ones running around a girl can get a bit busy. Until next time.....

hotrdumommy from A-Z

I ♥ The Dog With The Shifty Eyes

Hello my lovely's! I saw this A-Z blog on Handbags and Handguns (I love her blog. It is funny, insightful, and really picks me up on a long day). I decided to insert my answers for all of you who are curious....

A. Age: 30

B. Bed size: Queen size but want a California King Bed (cue Rhianna)

C. Chore you dislike: Doing laundry. I hate hauling it down the stairs. I hate sorting it. I hate folding it and I hate putting it away. I do like the smell of detergent though...

D. Dogs: No dogs personally (Lovey won't let me have one) but I love my aunt's dog Barnaby. And my mom's dog Whitey (RIP Whitey) 

E. Essential start to your day: Teeney Tiny starts whimpering around 7:00 am. If Lovey is off work, then the smell of breakfast gets me going. 

F. Favorite color: Pink (which I hated until I became a Phi Mu) 

G. Gold or silver: You would think with my skin tone gold, but I'm a silver kind of girl.

H. Height: 5'4"

I. Instruments you play(ed): Clarinet, Viola

J. Job title: Right now Stay At Home Mom but I'm working on it

K. Kids:  Itty Bitty-2 and Teeney Tiny-3 months

L. Live: Raleigh, NC

M. Mom’s name: Korri (It's pronounced Kah-ree but everybody says Core-Ree)

N. Nicknames: So many nicknames (Affie, Bean, Beenie Weenie (thanks Dad), Mosley, Mose, Big Itty Bitty (thanks Mom), Aflac)

O. Overnight hospital stays: 3 for my back, 2 for my c-sections

P. Pet peeves: people who pop their knuckles, people who call but don't leave a message, online "tough guys" and drama queens

Q. Quote from a movie: Just one? Well okay it's more of a dialogue but it's still my favorite. "Whoa what the hell are you doing to the ni**a's towel?" "I'm drying my hands." "You're supposed to wash them first." "You saw me wash them." "I watched you get them wet." "Well this blood is hard to wash off. Maybe if I had some Lava." "Hey I used the same soap as you and when I finished the towel didn't look like no goddamn maxi pad!" Samuel L. Jackson is a genius!!

R. Righty or lefty: Righty

S. Siblings: 3 brothers 1 sister

T. Time you wake up: 7:00 am (when Lovey is working) 9:00 (when he's not)

U. Underwear: mainly boyshorts because they are comfortable

V. Vegetables you don't like: Squash

W. What makes you run late: The kids

X. X-rays you’ve had: back x-rays and a few head scans

Y. Yummy food you make: Lasagna and Gooey Toffee Butter Cake

Z. Zoo animal favorites: Polar Bears

*I wanted to direct your attention to the pic at the top. It's from the scene on the Simpsons when Homer and Mel Gibson remade Mr. Smith Goes To Washington. Homer had suggested the villain in the movie be a dog with shifty eyes and at the end of the episode, we were indulged with a shifty eyed dog*

If 30 Is The New 20 Then I'm 20 On 4/20♥♥♥

Well peeps. I'm 30 today. I can honestly say that I didn't think I would live to see it. Anyone who knows my background and what I've gone through can attest to that. All I can do is thank God for seeing me through those hard times and showing me that my life is worth living and I still have more living to do. My twenty's did kick serious ass though. I graduated from college, started a career, started a family, started this blog LOL!! What do my thirties hold for me? Well if the world doesn't end anytime soon I see myself getting into YouTube videos that will make people think and crack up at the same time. I see myself having one more baby (me and PJ love making babies because we make the cutest ones I swear). I envision going to Italy and Las Vegas (even though I have to fly which I'm not happy about). And of course I see myself blogging a whole lot more than what I've been doing (I'm a social deadbeat LOL!!). Well that's about it. In my next post I'll talk about what I did for my birthday. I can say that PJ cooked me a bangin surf 'n' turf dinner that I'll have pics of. Well I'm off like a dirty shirt!!

Mr. Nice Guy-Party Accesories

P.S. I'm aware that my birthday is also on 4/20. Back in my 20's I participated but now that I'm a wife and mother, it's not for me anymore. But if you still celebrate then rock out with your cock out. It's all love "B". I love Half Baked. To me it's one of the best stoner movies around ♥

Top 10 Favorite Beauty Items

Nothing Says Beauty and Glam Like Holly Golightly

Hey everybody out there in blog land. I wanted to post a blog about my top 10 favorite beauty items that I use. Out of the stash of products I have bought over the years, these are the ones that truly stand the test of time and that I will keep buying over and over again.

1. Queen Helene Mint Julep Mask-This mask is my fave because not only does it feel good going on but it clears my blackheads and reduces the appearance of my pores.

2. Clarisonic Facial Brush-This face brush may be costly but it is well worth the money. It removes dirt and makeup that you might not be able to remove with just your hands or a wash cloth alone.

3. Clinique Black Honey Barely There Lipstick-This lipstick is universally flattering. On me it has a nice berry color that isn't too light or too dark. In fact I wore it when I got married!

4. Ped Egg-This thing obliterates dry patches on my feet and leaves them feeling baby smooth.

5. Miracle Foot Repair-This foot cream is not only soothing to my feet, it also leaves them smooth as a baby's butt.

6. Neutrogena Sesame Oil-I love stepping out of the shower and using this oil on my skin. I remember my mom using it when I was younger and I would sneak a little for myself. It leaves my skin soft but not greasy looking.

7. Burt's Bees Lemon Butter Cuticle Cream-I love this stuff. I first got it in a mini manicure set from Barnes and Noble and I've been hooked. No signs of hangnails when I use it and the smell is heavenly.

8. IC Fantasia Smoothing Heat Protectant Serum-I always use this when I use direct heat on my hair (blow dryer, flat iron, curling iron). It leaves my hair with a little swing to it and I don't notice any heat damage which means it's doing it's job.

9. Pink Sugar Sensual Perfume-This perfume first came to my attention as a sample from a Sephora order. It has a sweet smell that is also grown up. I can wear it out on the town as well as any day appointment.

10. MAC Fix+-This spray does it all for me. It refreshes, moisturizes my face and sets my make up without making it run. It also comes in lavender scent but I'll stick with the original.

Well those are my favorites! Are there any beauty products that you can't do without?

Is Facebook and Twitter Relationship Killers? Or Do People Need To Re-evaluate Their Relationships?



This Pic Is Too Funny

 Hey everybody. If you follow me on twitter you will know that last week I said that I was going to do a blog posting that would blow your mind. Well here it is...

A week ago I was looking at my twitter timeline when I saw that on of my followers had broken up with her boyfriend (for the millionth time). Looking at his tweets I saw that basically there was alot of passive aggression on both of their parts complete with relationship status changes, flirting with followers and sub-tweeting. *If you want to know what sub-tweeting means, Google it!* One of the tweets she put was "do people in relationships need to have Twitter and Facebook"? I look at it like this. Before I met Lovey, I was in a long distance long term relationship. We started dating when I was in college and it transferred into long distance after I graduated. Well before Facebook and Twitter and even MySpace, there was Black Planet and Yahoo Messenger. Well the guy I was with was a fixture on both, as was I. Except he was talking and chatting with other women and I was not chatting with other guys (until I found out that he was and I started). The trust in our relationship was hardly there and it didn't help that I had cheated on him. He took me back and I remained faithful but you could tell that even though he said he had forgiven, he wasn't going to forget and that's where the problems lied with us. He didn't trust me and because I was afraid of the "payback" I didn't trust him. Therefore when MySpace became the big social thing and I saw comments from women calling him "baby" and saying that they missed him, I hit the roof. After eight years of lies and mistrust on both sides, we finally called it quits. Do I blame social media for the relationships demise? Hell no. It was both of us who ruined that relationship. I ruined it when I cheated a year in and he ruined it by continually punishing me for it (after he said he forgave me and all was forgotten).

Fast forward to me and Lovey's relationship. We were friends on MySpace but when we started dating we were not friends on Facebook. At first I was kind of insulted because I wanted to know what kind of guy doesn't want to be friends with his girl on Facebook. Well when Lovey explained his position, I understood but I still wanted to friend him. The way he saw it, he didn't want to be friends on Facebook and then some girl says something out the way and I'm ready to kick ass. However I posed to him, if we trust each other then what a girl says on a "wall" would not matter because I would trust that my man would tell that chick to fall back. He understood my position too but he didn't friend me until I was pregnant with Itty. The way he saw it, if he didn't do it, it would be messed up.

I know you are wondering what the point is. This point is this. It doesn't matter what kind of social media you are into. They don't ruin relationships. The people who are in them are the ones who ruin them. If there is no trust and tons of jealousy, then of course Facebook is going to exacerbate those problems because one party will see a status like as flirting and commenting as going too far. I'll say this, if you're going to be friend on Facebook or Twitter, set boundaries and expectations not only for the social network but for the relationship. If you see something that raises a red flag, discuss it without resorting to passive aggressive tactics and please don't publicize it on the same social network because then you are dragging everyone into it and you look like the jerk. Small things like what happens on Facebook and Twitter can't weaken a strong relationship. I want to use the following analogy: When I was about 14, my brother threw a bolt at our sliding glass door and it didn't shatter. However when he threw a pencil, it did shatter. The bolt weakened the glass, so the small tap of the pencil brought it crumbling down. The same can be said about a relationship. If it is hit with something hard and the relationship still stands, take care to fix the small cracks that have weakened it because something as petty and small (like the pencil) can break it completely. Until next time...

This Is For My Lovey



And Then He Kissed Me...

 Hey everybody out there. It's me again and I thought that I would do a blog about my husband. Well the idea came when one day last week he asked me if I still blogged sometimes. I said yeah and he said that he remembered when I blogged on MySpace about him. I remembered those blogs too because that's when I really expressed my deeply rooted love for him. Don't get me wrong, I still am deeply and over my heels in love with him. There's not a day that goes by when I don't want to touch him, kiss him, and tell him I love him. I still listen to songs and immediately think of him. I know he probably thinks that the songs I sing along to are annoying but he should also know that if I am singing the words and not just humming then I'm singing to him because that particular song is how I feel about him. In fact I can name three songs of the top of my head and they are all by Beyonce (which is surprising in and of itself because I'm not the biggest Beyonce fan): Countdown, Love On Top, and Party. All three of those songs have lyrics that are exactly how I feel about Lovey. So what to blog about Lovey...

Well maybe I should start at when we met. We met when I was still working at the women's prison here. I started first and then by the time I came back from basic training, Lovey had just started. I didn't notice him at first, but when I first talked to him, I thought he was a nice guy but I wasn't crushing on him or anything. Well little did I know that he was kind of crushing on me. Well one day that crush became known because he called me in the unit I was working in and gave me his number and asked me to call when I got off work. Me being the oblivious one that I am still didn't realize that he had an inkling of liking me and I thought he wanted to ask me about something having to do with another coworker. When I called, we talked for a few minutes and then we ended up talking about restaurants. When I said that I never ate at Red Lobster, he asked if I wanted to go. I said yeah why not and we set a night to go. When I hung up, I was like I think I just got asked out on a date. Well I went out with him to Red Lobster, where I found out that he interviewed with the NYPD and that he was 10 years older than me. Now looking at him I still can't believe that he will be 40 this year. Seriously, I've seen him with his shirt off. He's hot okay? After dinner, we sat in his truck and talked some more because neither one of us was ready to go home yet. During the conversation, where I learned that he played basketball in college (I'm a sucker for basketball players), he asked me the question that changed everything for us. He asked if he could kiss me. I didn't even think, I just said yes. That kiss was long, passionate, beautiful, and to this day I still think about it and it's been six years ago. When he kissed me, I heard music. From that moment on, I knew that he was special.

We started hanging out off and on for the next few years, but we always talked and when I needed him, her was there for me as I was for him. However it was in 2009 when our dynamic really changed. In February I professed that I was seriously falling for him and I wanted to be with him for a long time. In May, things really got serious because that's when I found out that I was pregnant with Itty Bitty. What was so significant about me being pregnant was that a few years before he said that if we weren't seeing other people or married to anyone by the time I was 27 and he was 37, then we would have a baby. I thought he was joking at the time because I was already set on the fact that I didn't want kids, but here I was pregnant and I was 27 and he was 37. I was a bit wary about our relationship because I wanted him to know that even though I'm having his child, he's not obligated to lock things down i.e. getting married. However, when I said that, he made a face like why don't you think I wouldn't marry you. After having Itty, we were living together and we finally talked about getting married. At first we said Vegas, but then I wanted my family to see me get married so we picked a date that we both can remember 9/10/11 and we got married.

Fast forward five months from the day we tied the knot and we are still the same love sick kids we were back in his truck in 2006. When he kisses me I still hear music and we have our two beautiful girls. When I listen to Amy Winehouse I still smile because now all her music is about our relationship together. We've had ups and a few downs, but I wouldn't trade him for anyone in the world. I like to think that before we settled down, I was a perpetual playgirl. Going out and going crazy, daring someone to tame me. Well I can say that now I've been tamed and I wouldn't have it any other way. I love you Lovey and when I'm 70 and you're 80 I hope that the love we have for each other is still there along with your six pack LOL!!

Who? Who Doesn't Want to Wear The Ribbon? Me Because Susan G. Komen Pissed Me Off This Week



Bob and Cedric From Seinfeld (I Had To Do It)

 Hey everybody out there in blogoland (hehe cute huh?). As you can see from the title of the post I'm about to go in on The Susan G. Komen Foundation. Unless you were living under a rock this week, you have heard by now that earlier this week the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation announced it was cutting funding to Planned Parenthood. The funding was going towards breast cancer screening for Planned Parenthood's patients who normally consist of low income individuals and those who do not have insurance to pay for these screenings. When asked why funding was being cut SGK said that they had implemented new policies that prevent them from assisting any program that is under investigation. Yes Planned Parenthood is under investigation in Washington because the bozos up there want to make sure that federal money is not funding abortions which some Planned Parenthoods provide (more on that later). Well after that announcement was made, the world of social media was on fire. There hasn't been this much buzz since Beyonce rubbed her belly at the VMAs. Anyway the general consensus was that SGK's decision was politically motivated and nothing more because PP was the only organization this new rule affected. At first SGK said it wasn't political and that they were not backing down from their decision. Well apparently as Nino Brown put it in New Jack City: money talks and bullsh*t runs a marathon because SGK reversed their decision and announced that Planned Parenthood would continue to collect grant money from SGK as long as they were eligible to do so.

If you know me I have a lot of passions in life such as my family, my husband, cooking, shopping, the search for a delicious cocktail that doesn't taste like disinfectant (more on that later too) and politics. I know you're thinking how is Susan G. Komen and Planned Parenthood political Afton? Well I didn't think that I would be able to say Susan G. Komen and politics in the same breath until recently when everyone wants to think that when you walk into a Planned Parenthood the first thing they want to do is kill unborn babies. Let me start from the beginning...

Abortion is not pretty. It is not fun. It is not an easy decision to make. Don't ask me how I know but trust me on this. It is painful. It is a lonely isolating decision that will dog you the rest of your life. As for my position on it, I feel that it is every woman's right to make that choice for herself. It is not the government's right at all. The people who want to take that choice of whether to have a child is the same government that will turn it's back on you if you have said child and need help keeping your head above water. Planned Parenthood is there when that decision has to be made. Some PP would rather not perform abortions and rather give counseling on where to go as well as other options such as adoption. Some PP do perform abortions but it is done in a medical setting according to the laws of the state they are in. Like I said there are some people who want abortions made illegal and it is those people who are now in charge of Susan G. Komen. One of the directors of the charity once ran for governor under a pro-life agenda and she wants to sit with a straight face and say that the decision to cut funding to Planned Parenthood is not political? Yeah right I'm sure. What these nuts don't know or they know and don't care because they have an axe to grind is that Planned Parenthood provides health services to low income individuals. Those services include contraception and reproductive health. If you have a UTI and need to see someone, Planned Parenthood is there. Need birth control but embarrassed to ask the family doctor who comes to your house for dinner, Planned Parenthood is there. Abortions only account for 3% of what Planned Parenthood does. 3 stinkin percent. So when funding is cut, it doesn't hurt the ones who want an abortion because abortion clinics are a dime a dozen. It hurts the 97% who want affordable reproductive health care and that sucks hard (no pun intended).

So what to do moving forward from Susan G. Komen's fiasco? Well it all comes down to what we need to do as a collective people. We need to educate our sons and daughters about all aspects of sexuality. No we don't need to pop in Debbie Does Dallas and ask them to take notes. We need to have a frank heart to heart discussion on the ins and outs of sex (I know I know). When I was growing up, if I ever had a question about sex, I knew I could go to my mom. Sex Ed only covers so much. It is up to us to tell our kids not only our expectations but what needs to be done. For myself I can say that even though my girls are only 2 and 4 weeks old, I already know what I'm going to say to them. I would rather they did wait until they are married to have a sexual relationship with someone, but I'm not stupid either. I'm sure that's how my mother felt about me and my brother. In a dream world that would be perfect, but we know that it's not the truth. I would tell them that I don't want them to be stupid when it comes to making choices about sex. They need to protect themselves. The pill isn't going to save you from a disease that can't be cured, so make the guy wear a condom. That not only protects you but it protects the both of you from having to make a decision regarding the life of a child you may not be ready to take care of. That's the sad irony of those who want to close down Planned Parenthood. They want to push that no sex before marriage is the way to go. Hey if it was working then sure, but it's not. So get your head out of your culo and talk to your kids.

In closing let me just say this. I'm glad that Susan G. Komen changed their minds. Am I still mad? A little bit. Will I still try to enter the Race for the Cure? Maybe. Will I still buy or eat something pink? Of course. But I'll do it with my eyes a little more open now. Well folks rant is over. I'm about to cook me a Red Barons and do some homework. Until next time...

New Year, New Baby, Same Shopping Addictions



Queen Bey (She's A New Mama Too But Without the Budget Constraints)

 Hey everybody. It's your girl once again. You may have noticed a change in not only my blog's address but the title of the blog as well. What happened was that I purchased the domain hotrdumommy.com. However due to me being in the hospital having Itty v. 2.0 I let the payment lapse and well I would have to pay five times what I paid to get it back. No way that was happening, so I just started a new blog. I will not be purchasing another domain again until I am sure that I will remember to pay for the renewal. So just remember that it is now hotrdumommy82.blogspot.com. I have been changing everything that has the old url because now when you go to hotrdumommy.com some ad to purchase the domain comes up instead. Anywhoo....

As the title says it is a new year and with this new year came a new baby for me. I gave birth to Camille Adele on January 6th and after almost 2 weeks of her being in the NICU, she is home with me, Lovey, and Itty and we could not be happier. I will be writing about her birth story in a later blog because up to when I started to be induced everything was the same as with Itty but then things changed.

As for my same shopping addictions, yes I believe I may have a problem. Well I won't say problem because bills get paid and the family is eating. However, I will say that I am a product junkie and it's not just hair. It's also makeup, shoes and purses. So far this year I have bought:

• Naked 2 palette
• Pink Sugar Sensual perfume
• Clarisonic Brush Heads
• UD Rollergirl palette
• UD Perversion 24/7 eyeliner
• UD Lip Junkie in Naked
• Hello Kitty Brown Bag from Baghaus.com
• Black Platform Pumps from Shoedazzle.com
• Red Purse from Shoedazzle.com
• MAC Viva Glam Nicki lipstick

Oh yeah. That's alot of haulin' baby. Well I feel I've earned it and I've also been buying the girls somethings too. I've also been responsible by putting money into my car so that we can get around as well as paying the essential bills that need to be paid. So like I said I have a small little addiction but as far as I can tell it's under control and besides I think that Lovey would step in if things got too out of control.

Well that's about it for now, but stick around because I will be continuing to blog about my everyday life. Feel free to suggest what I should blog about next time. I think I will do a blog on my hair journey so far (it's been over a year now), Camille's birth story, plus some FOTD and OOTD blogs just to see how those turn out. Until next time...